Finish What I Started

So, this summer as camp has ended and as I look back, it has been a summer of hard work, fun, tender mercies, miracles, laughter, and blessings. There have been tears, smiles, confusion, laughter, and little amounts of sleep. As I got home each weekend, I would sometimes be told, "you look exhausted. How do you function at camp?" or "Wow, this week must have been rough." I have also gotten asked "Why do you keep coming back to camp when it is so much work for so little pay? Would you do it again?"

Well friends, I hope this post helps you understand what my summer (and my past few summers) have consisted of. I guess I will start by answering each of the above statements... Yes, I look exhausted because I am exhausted! You try taking care of up to 180 campers and 38 staff members for an entire summer. I wouldn't be doing my job right if I wasn't exhausted on the weekends.... How do I function at camp? Well, when you have so much to do, you learn to rely on the Lord 100% of the time. When you are with the campers, the Lord blesses you with energy. You always have the energy to do what the Lord needs you to so that these campers can learn to become closer to Him.

The last question deserves its own paragraph... "Why do I keep coming back and would I do it again?" I keep coming back because I am changed for the better every year. I become a better person and I become closer to the Lord. I come back because it has become my home. When I am at Brighton I feel completely safe. I gain 50 new sisters and best friends that I can rely on 100%. I get a chance to serve with all of my might, mind, and heart. I get to share my testimony with anyone and everyone I come in contact with. I get to help campers as well as staff build their testimonies and their relationship with their Heavenly Father. I get to make a difference in the life of at least one young woman and I get to do it while having fun! Would I do it again? YES!!!! I would do this over and over again in a heartbeat. This may not make sense unless you have been up to camp, but trust me, Brighton changes lives. It has changed my life in SO many ways and I can never repay the blessings Brighton has given me. I am a completely different person than I was in 2011. And I owe it all to Brighton.

Although camp is over, I will probably continue to share camp stories as they come to mind... Camp ended this past Saturday and it completely broke my heart. Thoughts have been racing through my mind about if I did enough... Did I listen and act on every prompting? Did I try my hardest? Did I touch the people I was supposed to influence? Did I make an impact on anyone? Well, these questions will not leave my mind and it really becomes a burden. But, there is no turning back. There is only the hope that I will get more opportunities to serve and make a difference.

As I drove home tonight after spending the day with some of my Brighton family, I was thinking about some events that happened this summer and one specific week and event stuck out in my mind and I would like to share it with you... A couple weeks ago one of our staff members twisted her ankle and she had to go down to the valley to make sure everything was alright. As her campers sat at breakfast, I felt like I should eat with them and get to know them better. I didn't really understand why since we have extra staff to do this and I wouldn't even be going on their hike with them, but I joined them anyways. I loved this opportunity and I instantly fell in love with those girls... After their hike, their counselor came back and she explained that she would not be able to climb up the ladder and stand on the zipline platform later that day to send her girls down.

Zipline can be scary and it is best for some girls if they know and trust the person who is sending them down (which is why counselors do it). Suddenly, I knew why I felt like I had to eat breakfast with them earlier that day. I quickly cleared my schedule and headed up with their unit to help at zipline. It was such a tender mercy to feel like a counselor again and to send those girls down. I was even able to teach them a song and I got to know them so much better. I got to adopt this unit and help them feel my love for them, this camp, and my Savior. What a blessing!

One Wednesday, this unit was one of the groups that was going on overnighter with me. As we were hiking up to our camp spot, I felt like I should stop and ask if anyone needed help. I was not holding anything since someone brought my stuff up while I was helping the girls get packed up so I felt compelled to help anyone I could. As I turned around and asked if anyone needed help, I heard one voice out of the group say that her friend "M" was crying and struggling. This was one of the girls that I had sent down zipline and as I walked over to her she explained that her pack was really heavy and it was really hurting her shoulders. I instantly wanted to take this load from her so I told her that she should take off the pack and I would carry it the rest of the way. As I said this, she looked at me with tear-filled eyes and with determination and said, "No, I want to finish what I started. I am not going to give up and I want to make it to the top." Wow. She is incredible. Most campers would have gladly taken my offer. Instead of carrying her pack for her, I told her that I would walk behind her and help her hold up the pack so that I was carrying some of the weight.

As we made it to our campsite, and the girls were laying out their tarps, I saw "M" sitting on her pack, still crying... I knew something was wrong so I decided to go over and talk to her. She explained to me how she is not normally the one that needs help and she was embarrassed that she needed that help. We were able to have a wonderful discussion about this experience. I try to take every opportunity I can get to relate anything to the gospel. This may not be a big deal to you as you read this, but I learned so much about myself as well as life in general through this short time I had to serve "M".

The first thing I learned is that we need to have determination and faith in the Lord that you can finish hard tasks. It would have been so easy for her to take off that heavy pack and give it all to me. Instead, she pushed through and gave it her all. She finished what she started. It would be easy for us to always take the easy path. But remember that you can do hard things!
Second, I learned how our Heavenly Father feels when we are carrying our heavy loads. He longs to take the pain away. He waits for you to call Him and ask for His help and then He is right there with us. Although He would love to take our loads from us, He knows that It is for our good and He knows we can do it. He sees the determination in our eyes and He helps by holding some of the weight of our loads. He knows that we can finish what we have started and He is filled with joy when you make it to your destination.
Third, I learned about the Lord's hand in my life and to take every opportunity you receive to serve. Honestly, I was struggling with some of my own physical problems which made it hard for me to do anything, but as soon as I was called to help, the Lord eased my pain and gave me energy to help this camper. The Lord was there as soon as I stopped thinking about myself, He was there to help me. He was there all along, but I could feel Him closer as I served. My load was lightened as I was lightening her load.
Fourth, accept help from others. Just because you need help, doesn't mean you failed, it just means that you have people who care and you do not have to go through life alone. When you accept service from others, you receive the blessing of having that extra support and they get blessing from serving you. When you do not accept help and service from others, you are preventing extra blessings for yourself as well as others trying to help. I am FAR from perfect on this life lesson so maybe it is hypocritical for me to even have this section, but it is true and I am slowly learning it. In a world that expects you to be so independent, it is hard to ask and accept help from those around you. I am still working on this, but I know that service changes people. As I try to accept help from others more, I hope and pray that you will do the same.

As a result of this small event, I was able to build a strong relationship with this young woman. I was able to get to know her better and I got the wonderful blessing of spending time with her, her unit, and their counselor. This was an eye-opening experience and I learned so much about myself. I was also able to build a new relationship and friendship that may have never been made if I did not offer to serve.

One last thing before I end this long post.... I learned that I need to accept help and show my gratitude for those that serve me. Remember back at the start of this post when I said someone served me and carried my bag up to our campsite while I was helping campers pack up their stuff? Well, I was not happy about this... I was being very selfish and I did not want to accept help from anyone. Looking back, I feel really bad that I did not just simply accept this help and service. If I would have had my own bag, then serving "M" would have been a lot harder physically. I do not really want to post names on this blog, but this person knows who they are... So here is a shout out to you! Thank you SO much for your selfless service. It really did help and mean a lot to me. I am sorry that I did not express my gratitude and accept your service sooner. But it meant the world to me that you cared enough to take time out of your day to do that for me. I love you to the moon and back!

Well, until next time, remain tall and firm. And keep serving others!